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do you ever see someone hot and you just think “bruuuuuuuuh” 


I’m constantly torn between the ‘be kind to everyone’ and the ‘fuck everyone you owe them nothing’ mentalities 



i was babysitting a little boy and girl once and the boy asked me if i had a boyfriend and i said “no!! but i have a girlfriend!” and he said “like a friend thats a girl?” and i said “no like a boyfriend but they’re a girl instead of a boy! we still do couple things but we’re just both girls” and he said, without missing a beat, “oh ok! are you gonna marry her?”

like it’s literally that easy for kids to understand

Children > Adults



If you’re a mistake, then you’re the greatest mistake I’ve ever made. I miss you more everyday I’m not with you.

you wanna see a disaster?


play the cha cha slide around a bunch of white folks and wait until the part where the dude goes “cha cha now real smooth”

me after calling someone out:  you must be wearing orthopedic shoes because you stand corrected